Jizz

This classic should need no introduction...

Almostboobs

My word! <--the truly not-safe-for-work version...

Almostboobs

First Aid FACT #21: In an emergency situation while waiting for medical professionals to arrive, a broken arm or wrist may be safely immobilized within the cleavage of a voluptuous woman...

Almostboobs

That creepy girl from The Ring is all grown up and you won't BELIEVE what she looks like now!

Almostboobs

I call bottom!

Almostboobs

How SirJimmy learned to count...

Almostboobs

Ain't no rest for the wicked...

Almostboobs

Two balloons?!?

Almostboobs

Don't overthink it. Others in the comments...

Almostboobs

I'm also okay with kneeling...

Almostboobs

Earth Angle, Earth Angle...

Almostboobs

A Girl without Freckles is like a Night without Stars...

Almostboobs

Dark Mode Beta for Cameron Diaz (archived)...

Almostboobs

Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene. I suggest you look in the comments for more...

Almostboobs

One of these things is not like the others!

Almostboobs

Always leave 'em wanting more! Spoiler - and more - in the comments...

Almostboobs

Gawd bless yo mama!

Almostboobs

Necked!

Almostboobs

"Nice pupaes, Chrysalis!"

Almostboobs

Boujee booty-booby boofy beauty!

Almostboobs

"Craps" are better than "slots"... Ready to click?

Almostboobs

Quarantine, day 26. I proposed some new rules for our game of "I'm Not Touching You!"

Almostboobs

Oh, THIS again...

Almostboobs

Quarantine, day thirty. Push came to shove with one of my step-sisters...

Almostboobs

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire...

Almostboobs

“What you’re seeing and what you’re reading is not what’s happening...”

Almostboobs

ME: I am NOT voting for Trump! HER:

Almostboobs

HER: I am a proud Trump supporter!!

Almostboobs

Watch once for levitation. Rewatch as need be for prestidigitation...

Almostboobs

Converted crossover content via our good friends at r/AlmostBooze...

Almostboobs

Ho! Boom about! Heave down or eat caulk, me Darlin'!

Almostboobs

Thanks! I hate it...

Almostboobs

Too chesty for Etsy? Let's see...

Almostboobs

Find someone who fucks you just as hard as they make you laugh...

Almostboobs

Reminder: Girls do HILARIOUS Santa Claus impersonations!

Almostboobs

To clarify: THIS is what to submit! It's source and other examples of what NOT to submit are in the comments...

Almostboobs

Writhing in agony is better than withering & dying. Ready to click?

Almostboobs

Yeah, well, I was tired of her shit, anyway...

Almostboobs

It's mah Cake Day, Beeyatch!

Almostboobs