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Adultconnect Uk pics

Hotel California is basically a negative Yelp review with a two minute guitar solo.

Hotel California is basically a negative Yelp review with a two minute guitar solo.

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Sorry I pissed on the walls of your bathroom, but the flowery wall paper made me

Sorry I pissed on the walls of your bathroom, but the flowery wall paper made me think I was outside.. Also you're out of Valium

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How do two lawyers greet each other? With a firm handshake.

How do two lawyers greet each other? With a firm handshake.

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What's the name of the best brewer in the world? Bock Goodale

What's the name of the best brewer in the world? Bock Goodale

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Q: How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 22 one to screw

Q: How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

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When I die, I want a disease named after me, with symptoms that include "being

When I die, I want a disease named after me, with symptoms that include "being fucking awesome at everything."

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Your baby might be adorable, but so is my cat and she cleans her own butt.

Your baby might be adorable, but so is my cat and she cleans her own butt.

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CW: The boss said she wanted to see you. Me: That's flattering, but I don't date

CW: The boss said she wanted to see you. Me: That's flattering, but I don't date people from work.

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I think r/jokes may be glitched Top of all time and new both show the same jokes

I think r/jokes may be glitched Top of all time and new both show the same jokes

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A programmer began to cuss Because getting to sleep was a fuss. When laying in her

A programmer began to cuss Because getting to sleep was a fuss. When laying in her bed Looping round in her head Was: while (!asleep()): sheep++;

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Them: If you were stranded on a desert island with any two people, living or dead,

Them: If you were stranded on a desert island with any two people, living or dead, who would they be? Me: Can they both be dead?

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Did you hear about the man who choked on an issue of The Guardian after learning

Did you hear about the man who choked on an issue of The Guardian after learning about his brothers passing? He found the news hard to swallow.

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Put the punchline in the title. How do you piss off a redditor?

Put the punchline in the title. How do you piss off a redditor?

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Islam is a race. Because it's inbreeds fucking each other.

Islam is a race. Because it's inbreeds fucking each other.

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Dad and son A son asks his father "Why does my bum hurt" while the father

Dad and son A son asks his father "Why does my bum hurt" while the father replies "Because I love you son"

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Life is like art done in chalk, beautiful but temporary, enjoy it while possible.

Life is like art done in chalk, beautiful but temporary, enjoy it while possible.

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What type of fruit is not allowed to get married? Cantaloupe...

What type of fruit is not allowed to get married? Cantaloupe...

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If you hear the words "oh yeah, suck it" coming from my bedroom, it's probably

If you hear the words "oh yeah, suck it" coming from my bedroom, it's probably just me vacuuming.

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The Presidential Debate We don't know if Hillary is telling the truth, and we're

The Presidential Debate We don't know if Hillary is telling the truth, and we're hoping Trump isn't

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I feel quite light today. Pounds aren't what they used to be.

I feel quite light today. Pounds aren't what they used to be.

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