Jizz

want to know an instant way to make your cock bigger? ... Shove the ruler into your stomach harder

randomsexiness

Whoever invented 'Ladies First' is a fucking genius. It's the easiest way to stare at a woman's ass without getting caught.

randomsexiness

I swear to god, one day I will have my revenge. One day it'll be the onion crying.

randomsexiness

Marriage: Betting someone half your shit that you'll love them forever.

randomsexiness

wait. it's stuck lemme get that for you

RealGirls

I refuse to let my son become a mime. It's frightening how many of them end up on the street.

randomsexiness

incredible cleavage

randomsexiness

short shorts

randomsexiness

butterface

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on the stairs

randomsexiness

Still {f}ucking bored ;)

gonewild

I know, I should have edited out the dude's back to the right but it is 6 in the morning and I'm rushing to get these posted before I head to work.... where I'll spend all my free time here.

randomsexiness

someone photoshop her onto a surfboard

randomsexiness

from behind

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another lifeguard

randomsexiness